The Magical Bag dialogs - part III

Please start with part one, then part two, or if you haven't read them, the Mushroom Dialogs.

=== A Manufacturer's Warranty ===

(You noticed this sewn in the lining of a magical bag)

This olde and veritably useful bag is one of the wonders of
our moderne age. It is guaranteed to never be damaged or
stainede by the impediments or age or deleterious effectes
and its contents are likewise protected from maleovolent
entities which would draine magik or damage your valuables.

Do not fret if you shoulde lose this bag, as you will
discovere a truely wondrous thinge. Should you find
another bage of the same nature, the contents of the two
bags are twinned and identycal - what you put in one, you
shalle take from the other. This is due to the miraculous
propertyes of the 'publyk keye dna quantum entanglemynt
pocket dymensional appetures' that the fabryk of the bagge
is woven from and a patent is pending on this and other
magiks.

- The wizards of the magical bage company.